Kids, Covid-19 and Nightmares

Kids, Covid-19 and Nightmares

Photo by Fusion Medical Animation on Unsplash

Kids, Covid-19 and Nightmares

Article by: Dr. Kari Moskowitz

It’s a scary time right now–as hard as it is for adults, the difficulty is magnified for kids, who don’t have the capacity to think in the same way as adults and understand why they are being restricted. When kids are scared or trying to work through something, it often comes up while they are dreaming, especially in the form of nightmares.

What are nightmares?  

Nightmares are scary dreams that generally wake your child up from sleep and seem very real to him or her.  Depending on your child’s age, it is often difficult for children to separate a nightmare from reality even after your child awakes from the nightmare.  Nightmares can often make your child upset and afraid to go back to sleep often resulting in bedtime struggles or refusal.

How is COVID-19 affecting kids?

The Center for Disease Control says risk of exposure to covid-19 is low for children, however research on natural disasters makes it clear that children are very vulnerable to the emotional impact of traumatic events that disrupt their daily lives.  For instance, children suffer when having to adjust to their routines – school closures, social distancing, home confinement – which may interfere with their sense of structure, predictability and security.  They can also be keen observers of people and the environment and react to stress with negative feelings (fears, worries, sadness, anger) in their parents and other significant others. 

Deirdre Barrett (2020), a dream researcher and assistant professor of psychology at Harvard University, reports that there is an increase of pandemic-related dreams in children.  The dreams may be about death or more metaphorical such as monsters chasing them or assaulting family members, reflecting the fact that the virus is invisible. Responses to the COVID-19 threat are unique and varied.  Some children may be irritable or clingy, some may regress, demand extra attention, and/or have difficulty with self-care.

The following are some ideas for how to deal with COVID-related nightmares in your pre-school/elementary school-aged child.

How to deal with  COVID-related nightmares

  • Help your child calm down at night, such as breathing deeply.  Stick to a relaxing bedtime routine. Keep bedtime routines light and happy and fun.
  • If they have a nightmare, coddle and reassure your child.  Stay with your child for a short period following the nightmare.  They will still be tired and may go back to sleep.  If they will not go back to sleep, give them something that reminds them of you such as a favorite tee-shirt or a special pillow.  You can leave the light on and the bedroom door open.
  • Discuss nightmares during the day.  Have your child draw pictures of the dream if they cannot articulate them.  After drawing the picture, have your child rip it up and throw it away as a symbolic gesture. 
  • Talk about the dreams and give them a positive ending.  This will give the child a sense of control about the dream.
  • Redirect your child’s attention to something good that you know you’re going to be able to do that day and will look forward to.  Do this prior to bedtime.  Take the dream and solve the problem, defeat the monster or overcome the anxiety. Rehearsing the nightmare while awake could cause a more positive outcome the next time that the child has the same dream.
  • Rather than dealing with the aftermath of a bad dream, you could try “ordering up” (as if off a menu) of some better ones prior to having your child get into bed.  For instance, have them tell themself “I want to dream about this tonight”. 

The important thing is to Increase children’s self-efficacy. Self-efficacy is the sense of having agency or control – an especially important trait during times of fear and uncertainty.  Children often feel more in control when they can play an active role in helping themselves families and communities, which in turn may decrease their nightmares about COVID-19

Resources for children about Covid-19 and staying healthy

Dr. Kari Moskowitz is a child psychologist practice at Integrative Therapy of Greater Washington who is available for consultations and treatment of children and the adults who care for them.

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